Dear Hubby 🌹
Hey look! Remember the roses you gave me last night? Well, take a look. I'm regifting them back to you in the form of a corny post. Here, these are for you…
You're going to bed right now & I've decided to stay up a little longer just to write you something special. When you wake up, maybe you can take a peek & see what I've done.
First off, thank you for giving me an early Valentine's gift last night! That was so kind. I'm sorry if I didn't jump for joy or get too excited when you gave them to me. I was just so tired, that's all. But in reality & way deep down where it really counts, it felt really sweet.
I'm the one that always buys the cards in advance & tries to run around making sure that when you wake up, there's something special waiting for you by the coffee pot to put a smile on your face. Today, I just stayed in my room again. I didn't leave the house & I apologize.
So this is my gift to you.
This corny post.
I took a picture of the flowers you gave me & I'm giving them back to you. Kind of like a regifting. Except with written words. Almost like that post I wrote on Medium where I gave my anniversary roses to those bullies after my suicide attempt.
But this is Valentine's Day. So it's different.
I needed to let you know something. I needed you to hear how grateful I am to have crossed paths with you. I needed to do something extra out-of-the-ordinary to show how much I appreciate you.
The spiritual experts, gurus, teachers & masters all say that gratitude is the fastest way to manifest miracles in your life. They say that if you practice saying gratitude affirmations or simply saying “Thank You” to small things in your life or to those around you, your vibrational level changes.
I believe it.
I've practiced it silently or put on meditation music from YouTube & noticed a shift in my consciousness. There are days I don't consistently do it & I have definitely noticed a difference when I don't, but maybe just writing this will help. Even if for a little while.
The biggest quality I want you to know I appreciate you for this Valentine's Day is – your simplicity.
And by simple, I don't mean you're uneducated or dumb or not worldly or not sophisticated or not cool or you're behind-the-times.
You're just satisfied with what IS.
You don't have any social media profiles, you don't post anything online for the whole world to see, you don't have the highest digitally upgraded equipment in the house, you don't try to be famous for anything. You're just plain content to be in the background. You're humble. You just live your life. Day by day. One by one. Next moment to the next.
In that respect, I adore you.
They say opposites attract to balance each other out. Maybe so. Because look at all the social media posts I've written. Look at all the crazy stuff I've posted. You know it's all true. But still?
AND… then, there’s you.
But you know about all of it & it doesn't seem to bother you somehow. You accept it. Or maybe you're just good at pretending it's OK.
I'm not quite sure. I honestly think it's because you knew I really needed some new & different friends after all I've been through.
THANK YOU FOR THAT!
Thank you for seeing my brokenness & my wanting to grow & reach out into the world to find joy again. To make new & exciting friends. To have fun this time around in my life. To take some risks. To laugh again the way I used to.
There are times when I wish you were just as flamboyant as I tend to be. I wish you would just come out of your shell & dance a little more in public. Be a little more spontaneous. But I can't wish you to be something that you're not. I can't change you. So I won’t.
Just like you can’t change me.
So… here is my grateful post letting you know how much I appreciate you. Even with all the differences we have, I still see similarities as well.
All I know is – I really do still love you.
I STILL do after all these years…
P.S. Oops, I almost forgot. Happy Valentine's Day!