Anita-Corbo

I went to the beach last night.

I went with my hubby & stuffed monkey son Cuzzy. In case you didn't think you heard or read that right – YES!

REPEAT: A stuffed monkey son. 🐵

I've had him for about 24 years. He pretty much goes with me everywhere.

Here is the silly video:

(You can hear in the background adamantly telling my husband to “Wave, wave, wave)!!! 😂

TO MY HUSBAND -

I hope whenever you look at this video…

• You try & remember that we really do have a good life. 💑
• You look at the beautiful waves & you remember the day we got baptized here 9 years ago. Remember when I almost floated away because the waves pulled me under & you ran to go save me? 😆
• You look at the serenity of the sunset & realize that this is the peace I always wish for you. Always. 🌅
• You look at the stillness around you & recognize that in spite of my screaming panic attacks, this is the contentedness I feel whenever I truly think of you. 🙏
• You see Cuzzy waving at the end & realize how blessed I feel knowing that we gave him a home for 24 out of our 25 years together. You made him have a family. 👪
• You see Cuzzy waving & just know I love you so much for accepting me as I am from the beginning. I didn't want to have children & you knew that. So you bought him for me after dating a year together. This way I had someone to dress up & play with me every day. 🐒
• You never saw that as a flaw. Instead, you embraced the little kid & little child inside of me. 🙆
• You never judged me on my past because you really accepted me for who I became instead, not who I used to be. 🤗
• You see the sun setting behind clouds & remember that not every day is going to have sunshine. But having someone you love on cloudy days is just as good. 🌥
• You play the video & when you watch it just know that I don't care how many people viewed it or liked it, as long as YOU do & that's the only one that matters. 💏
• You see this video & are grateful that I have a sense of humor because sometimes I honestly forget I actually do. 😁
• You see Cuzzy waving & after he does that, he touches his eyes & heart & points at the camera. You know what that means, right? It means I – LOVE – YOU. (👁❤☛)
• You look at this & see that I made this memory because I'm always worried we won't have enough good memories to remember & that scares me. 😔
• That maybe you look & hear my giggling & see this & know there still might be some joy left inside of me after all? 💃
• That you look at this memory & one day you will realize that in spite of my depression & in spite of my sadness & me not trusting anyone anymore, you still see something redeeming in me & I actually made an effort for you to see that. 😍
• That when you see Cuzzy waving in the end, you realize that you were actually a really great father all these years. Even if other people just see a silly stuffed monkey, what YOU see is that I was a actually a really good mother to him all these years, too. We actually were really great parents, weren't we? 👫
• And lastly, like you always told me, it doesn't matter how other people see us. What matters is how WE see each other. As long as WE still love each other, you always say. As long as WE still have all of us three together. As long as WE still have YOU, ME & CUZZY…
• The only 3 that matters…
• Those are all the things I hope you see…

💑 🐵 💑