anobody

Head fixed on entering Guild Wars Two (NCSOFT et. al. 2012) before bed. My appetite for it wetted aplenty with some before bed YouTube. It occupied my thoughts as l woke up to number two calling. The feeling of this number calling was carried out of some dreamy road-trip with family and friends into the real darkness of my room. Went on to get some tunes while I did my business.

It downloading in the background as I distract myself here.

How scary this little obsession appeared to me. Is it? Do I want to play hooky (Urban Dictionary et. al. 2022) and skip The School of Life again? It’s been roughly four years since I remember last been destructively hooked into a game. I failed a subject in the Masters program because of it. Stood before a panel. Got sent to the psychologist’s office. Now that I am bumming out at home, was I ready to fail The Subject? Life Itself?

Time for some silly justification. Well if being born again is real (Eugene H. P. … St. John et. al. 2002), then perhaps I will re-interpret the following interpretation

”If I went around doing whatever I thought I could get by with, I'd be a slave to my whims.” (Eugene H. P. … St. Paul et. al. 2002)

… I will subvert this later … too early for this shit. Eugene did not write any shit. He wrote fucking gold. I was listening to the book of John for my bedtime story. I am just shit this morning.

Are all these echoes from the past? Am I just digging my own grave? They say …

“Told him so. Saw it coming. He ignored the unbroken rule of cause and effect (Steve F. et. al. 2006). That’s why he is a sorry virgin, dirt-poor single, gutted with fat shame, with only a second-hand bike for his car. He let one girl tie up his fate. He let her set the flame, then he foolishly blew the flames into utter destruction. What a loser.” (Demons Inc. et. al. -4540000)

I have started the flames to burn it all down. Burn (all) The Ships (for KING & COUNTRY et. al. 2018) except a(n) ark, except a family. My blood parents and siblings.

We will see what’s left when it’s all over. Maybe it’s all over tonight. Bare (my cremation creeps), here I come.

There goes my mind (Imagine Dragons et. al. 2022). Seems like the right direction. Feels roughly great. I am working in this mist of … whatever existence is.

And of course, I can’t even end without mentioning masturbation. How pathetic, old, and lame. Had to push away the thoughts of past porn stars, even characters from innocent cartoons like Prince of Egypt (DreamWorks et. al. 1998). But none of them weren’t my wife, I just used a little anger to flit them out of my head. It certainly is easier to reach orgasm with real faces, real people.

Instead, I satisfied (my alt word for masturbation from here on) myself with a self-construction of Lady Death (Coffin Comics et. al. 1991). A completely blackened figure, eyes full of light Full breasts, hips, and rear. Flowing long hair. Then it was nighty night. I was relaxed for sleep.

Unoriginal? My unashamometer is at 98.5%. Nothing is original (Jim J. et. al. 2004).

Guild Wars Two is ~69% downloaded and paused at that value before the publishing of this post.