Submit
Each day, more information arrives and more clarity appears. And thus far, all I have been trying to do is what I have always tried to do. Educate people, warn them, try to get them to see. Help them. Only to discover that they don’t care. They go silent. They stop reaching out. No one ever says “I think that after decades of knowing you to be a sane and rational person, it appears as if you have suddenly turned into a raving lunatic. Also you’re saying a lot of words that are upsetting and I’d prefer to keep my head in the sand than even follow a single request from you.”
It is a fruitless mission. It always has been – no matter what message I’m trying to communicate. And meanwhile, all that time and energy is spent on futility instead of on myself. My own safety. My own ability to keep my mind free.
It’s the loneliest place I’ve ever been. This past year, as I have gradually found myself waking up, each new level that I unlock brings the loss of a few more of my people. They can’t keep up anymore. I can't even carry them or drag them along. They've given up already.
In the past, I’ve at least been able to make “online buddies” who understand. Now they're all potential robots and enemies.
I suppose I’ll just hold my tongue then. Smile sweetly. Continue on with the facade. Speak only of bread and circuses. Do what they want me to do. What everyone else did a long time ago.
Submit.