a personal space for reading, reflecting and rambling šŸ“ššŸ““šŸ¾šŸ–‹ļø

Weeknotes: Week 43 of 2023

Less than 10 weeks left in the year!

šŸ§ Most of my brain energy this week was occupied with grief and anger over the current state of Palestine and anxiety over my upcoming recital. Even so I had a fairly eventful week. Trying to reset my mental state as much as possible so I donā€™t start the new week with overwhelm.

šŸ‘»As a self-identifying goth and lover of all things spooky, the expenditure on brain energy for the things mentioned above and also a very skinny wallet this month means that I did not make any grand (or petite) Halloween plans. Iā€™m completely okay with this because other things are more important but also keeping my Instagram use to a minimum has really killed the FOMO. The past few years Iā€™d always feel like I failed somehow in not taking the opportunity to fly my spooky flag as aggressively as possible during October but so much of that is based on consumerism. Ironically this is the first year weā€™ve had actual Halloween decorations and Iā€™m perfectly happy with keeping them to myself than worrying if theyā€™re good enough for social media.

šŸ‘ Went to my first bingo game as an adult and also my first drag bingo. I love that the queer community here is so active and more importantly I love that events here adhere to what we fondly refer to as ā€œold-people hoursā€. A big barrier to taking part in queer or queer-centric events back in Tokyo was the focus on nightlife, bars and drinking. All of which I do enjoy but found fairly early that I do not have the mental or physical fortitude for. Itā€™s also nice to know that youā€™re more likely to make friends who will remember you the next day without a potential drunken haze getting in the way.

šŸŽŖWhile itā€™s technically not part of week 43 I have to say that my tsugaru shamisen recital was successful! I was but a blip in the many amazing performances and although I was nowhere near ā€œgoodā€, the audience was kind to beginners and I also wasnā€™t ā€œterribleā€. Most importantly though, despite making me physically ill before the show my stage fright did not affect the performance! I felt like I did as well as I was going to do regardless of the circumstances and I finally have proof that I can play an instrument infront of a crowd of complete strangers without choking.

šŸ’ŖšŸ¾I did some aerial hoop for the first time in months and for the first time since my last horrible endometriosis flare up which left me in too much pain to move properly for weeks. My stamina is understandably non-existent and I have to build up a tolerance to the motion sickness once again (worse than I remember if Iā€™m being honest) but my muscle memory stayed intact and Iā€™m stronger than I expected.

šŸ’»Trying to stay updated and share information means that I am back on social media (primarily Twitter) for the time being. While I did revive my Tumblr after stepping back from Twitter and Instagram I am considering deleting it (again) since I have a blog for sharing longform thoughts and Tumbr can be just as unproductive. Currently debating what I would like to do with my Wordpress blog which Iā€™ve ben using for book reviews since I also have a Bookstagram. I prefer and genuinely love the bookish community on Instagram but the pressure for pretty pictures (which I do not have) is so intense I donā€™t share as much as I want to. The workaround is to realize that Iā€™m just doing this for myself anyways so it shouldnā€™t matter. Will probably work towards doing an account purge at the end of this year.

šŸ’øLast week I wrote about caving and reviving my Kindle Unlimited subscription. I have since pivoted hard in the other direction and finally deleted my Amazon account altogether along with the subscription. Itā€™s a bit more work but I can always flip through manga in person at a bookstore or trying the free chapters that other sites have available before deciding to purchase. Similarly, I will have to find alternative ways of supporting the Amazon-only authors that I follow but luckily many of them have Patreons or Ko-fi and more authors have been starting to publish wide so I will keep an eye out. Will think about how this can factor into my no/low buy as well.

šŸŽ§In leaving Kindle Unlimited, I rejoined Scribd since they also host a fair amount of indie publications and their audiobook selection so far tends to outstrip the current libraries that I use so I will definitely be spoiled for choice.

šŸ“–Halfway through ā€œA Day of Fallen Nightā€ and the plot payoff has been great so far. Like in ā€œThe Priory of the Orange Treeā€, Samantha Shannon spends a painstaking amount of time building up all corners of the world and trickling bits of the plot in before it all starts to pick up steam. Currently challenging myself to finish before the end of October (šŸ’¦) as itā€™s been a while since Iā€™ve started the month with a clean reading slate.

šŸ§¶Finished crocheting my first cocoon cardigan and currently working on a wrap top in a gorgeous shade of eggplant purple using this pattern from Madeline Shirley.

šŸ““Iā€™m getting more excited about starting my 2024 Hobonichi planners since they begin around the end of November. That way I have about a month to figure out how best to utilize everything for the new year. I got a decent amount of inspiration from this video by Youtuber JashiiCorrin who has an impressive lineup of notebooks and fun ways of using them.

#weeknotes #personal