Being Mindfully with kids
I've read the 5 books by Karsten Dusse, a German writer. A nice story about Bjorn Diemel and his way to a better work-live balance through mindfulness. It's a guide wrapped inside a story which makes fun to read. Netflix also released an 8 piece series about it. The makers of the series did an impressive job, transferring the book into a visual format. So, give the books or the series a try. It's worth it. 🙂
Some techniques mentioned in there are, for example, breathing. When in a stressful situation, stand straight and breathe. Feel everything around you. How does the floor feel under your feed? What do your hands feel, the material of your pants or jacked? And so on.
On Sunday, I needed exactly this. I was cooking with my oldest, while the little one was lurking around us in the kitchen. Both kids have the habit of not caring whether the other one has a problem or requires attention. The number 1 rule for them is (they think this is a rule), who screams louder is the one who gets attention. (We try not to obey this rule) So while I was cooking with the oldest and explained to him what and why I was doing the cooking, the little one required attention. I don't know why, but at some point it got chaotic. My oldest was asking questions and the little wanted to share his ball and was insisting that you will take it. Then the pot boiled over.
Instead of screaming, I said out loud to myself, so that the oldest can hear it: “Breath. Hold on, stand still and just take 3 long breaths”. I stopped everything and did exactly this. After I was done, I spoke to myself and checked if the oldest will recognize it. “Do everything, step by step. First take the pot from the stove. Second, check in on the little one. Third, focus on my oldest. Forth, clean everything.”
It was a strange situation, but my oldest seems fascinated in what I did there. After we were done with the cooking, he talked to me and said that he liked how I handled the situation. Later that evening, when my wife was back, he said the same to her. I was proud of myself.
Together with my wife, we made the plan, that we will do this whenever we can. Preferable in situations that are easier to handle. So that the children can learn from us, how we will solve these situations, where we are on the verge of exploding. I wished, I had something like this in my childhood.
I like this, with children it is never too late. There are living mostly in the moment, and you can always change directions and fix it.
36/100 of #100DaysToOffload