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Breaking Cycles Through Writing

Writing a book every year is how I break cycles. They define the end of a cycle for me. Every time I’ve published a new book, it’s started me on a different path immediately after. They delineate a distinct shift in my life. My new book on powerlessness coming in 2024 will be no different.


Powerlessness has been a cycle that I’ve held onto most of my life. It’s an untrue perception of reality that caused me to sabotage myself a whole bunch. Powerlessness is simply a feeling of being out of control in your own life. One of the things that has been coming up for me and that I’ve been talking about a bunch, is this idea of finding your point of control in a given experience.

When you feel out of control the fastest way to correct that is to question where your point of control is.

What do I have control over in this scenario?

This helps to keep you from wanting your power to be where it isn’t, wishing your power away, just simply giving up your power, and further sabotaging yourself. It gives you the opportunity to make a conscious choice about what to do next.

Those conscious choices matter because they are what give you your power in any situation.

If you’re not making conscious choices, you’re in a default state of awareness, and consequently you’re giving up your power unintentionally. Blindly reacting to what’s happening typically offers dysfunction and chaos. Cycles are unconsciously repeated. Pain is unconsciously held onto and perpetuated.

Conscious choices give you the ability to break the cycles, stop the pain, and manage yourself within the experience. By managing yourself consciously it puts your power back inside of you. When you’re making conscious choices you’re not wishing your power was somewhere else. You’re not trying to control things you don’t have control over. You’re consistently and consciously choosing actions and words that will give you the best outcome possible.

You may not like the outcome even after making conscious choices. Sometimes that triggers some pain that says that it doesn’t matter what we do, nothing changes anyway. It still doesn’t work out.

Here’s the thing with conscious control and your point of power – it’s not about always getting what you want. It’s not really about affecting the outcome all the time. Sometimes we’re meant to have the experience, not to change it, but to understand it.

What’s the point of this experience?

Sometimes the experience is there for you to break the cycle by responding consciously to what’s going on. Sometimes the experience is there so that you can go through it and become aware of yourself within it. You’re meant to learn from the experience in that scenario. Sometimes the experience is meant to help you solidify a new way of being in your life, meaning the cycle is broken and the Universe is just checking to make sure you’re ready to move on from it.

How will you know what’s what?

Questioning your experience and becoming consciously aware of what’s happening around you.

Pay attention to your experience. It’s talking to you all the time.

How do I know that writing books indicates a cycle ending? Because I’ve done this a few times. I pay attention to my experience. I can almost watch the shifts happen from outside of myself now. I see the effect that writing a book has on my experience. It’s different with every book, but there is reliably always a shift.

If I was working unconsciously, if I wasn’t paying attention to my experience, I wouldn’t know that. I’ve taught myself to pay attention to what happens when I do something. I do a thing and watch the outcome, regardless of how big or small the thing is. That allows to be learning from my experience constantly and consistently.

I remember when I first started writing books. The first book I ever wrote was about 60 pages in length. It was called The Truth of My Awakening. After I put that book out, my work shifted because suddenly I realized that it was okay to write. I started to understand how to write in a way that wasn’t so painful. After that book I made a conscious choice to stop offering pain in my writing. I acknowledge the pain, I just don’t perpetuate the pain.

It would be a few more books before I’d become aware of the pattern. My awareness of the pattern actually bothered me at the time because it made the books feel somewhat pointless. One of the things that I had to accept about the work that I was doing, was that I was doing it as much for myself as I was for my audience. I needed to write the book as a way to solidify what I had learned through the cycle I was breaking.

Powerlessness is a major cycle in my life. It’s something I’ve held onto for most of 48 years of life. Taking everything I’ve learned about powerlessness and putting it in a book that will hopefully help others that are struggling with powerlessness, is rewarding for me. It’s not pointless. It’s needed.

One of the cool things that’s coming with this book is a shift in how I write my books. I admit to not planning my books very much. I allow my intuition to guide my writing almost exclusively. One of the things that I’ve been learning about myself is that I give up my power to my own intuition. I’ve been slowly trying to teach myself that I can take on the ideas my intuition offers me, but I don’t have to give up control. I can make a slight shift in what I’m being offered so that it works better. I can make plans and allow my intuition to help me implement those plans. It’s not all or nothing. I can take some control over what my intuition offers me.

Where can you become more conscious of yourself within the experience?

Where can you begin to be more aware of the outcome so that you can start to understand what’s happening?

What cycle are you currently breaking, if any?

If you don’t know because you’re not paying attention, now’s the time to start thinking about it. You don’t have to stay in that feeling of powerlessness. You can shift it. You just have to decide you’re ready to make those conscious choices and do the things that will allow you to heal yourself.

What are you waiting for?

Love to all.



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