Memories
“If only you’d try” they say, shaking their heads
My dismissive shrug met with frustration
Truth, this place is petty cruelties
Suffering with their implicit blessing, so why should I care?
Sitting on the bleachers, failing gym because
I will not disrobe in front of these monsters in child’s guise
This, I tried, never again
Cruelties I do not care to revisit
English, the teacher kind to me
I want desperately to please her but
I cannot see the board without the glasses I have lost
I shrug, I am too afraid to ask for help
“What are you wearing” they ask
Laughing, pointing at the clothes my mother made me
Happy, thinking she was helping
Not understanding the pettiness of children
Later, Facebook, friend requests
From those who once bullied me
And those who stood by
Thinking we were friends because I’m skinnier now
Because I can afford nice clothes
Because I am traveling
Forgetting how they laughed
And made me feel worthless and weak
You could have been kind to me then
When I was desperately seeking connection
Were I able, I would find it in myself
To find your weaknesses and be cruel to you too