Questions No One Asked (SFW Edition) #1

I’ve done I think four “questions no one asked” on Diotima After Dark (<— NSFW) but I don’t think I’ve actually done one here. So, why don’t we give one a try? What do you think?

Well, whether you said yes or no… we’re doing it anyway. ^_^

That is what shitty politicians call a “non-binding referendum.”

Q: Do you look like your profile picture on Blahaj / Mastodon?

In the sense that I’m a tiefling and I have tiefling features, yes. But is it accurate? Not really. First of all, my skin tone is way off. I generated that back before I knew how much AI sucked (and I do have a commission in, I promise.) Trying to get AI to understand that my skin is pewter with faint blue highlights (AI likes to whitewash, for sure,) trying to get the right eye color (amber, FWIW,) trying to explain that my hair is charcoal colored, shimmery, and wavy, that my horns are fucking petite… ugh. Just… ugh. So it annoys me, but in my defense I usually disappear after a few months so I didn’t think it would matter. I’m working on a better pic, I promise.

Q: Why not just share your actual face?

The governments of Earth Realm have done experiments on you humans based on your ethnicities / races / religions, what do you think they’d do to a devil girl with horns and a tail? I’d be in some lab getting dissected. No thanks.

Q: You’re not a devil girl though, you’re human. Right?

Hn. Look. I’ve been over this before but I guess some of you are new, right? So yeah, I could be some weird introvert sitting in her bedroom being dumb online, pretending to be a tiefling. Or, maybe I’m actually a tiefling and you’re talking to a for real tiefling girl who obviously can’t share what she is publicly because like… dissection and stuffs.

The second one is more fun, right? So go with that, and if I ever feel safe enough, maybe you’ll even get proven right some day.

Q: Okay fine. So you’re tiefling. How do you disguise yourself; you can’t stay inside ALL of the time?

Magic.

Ha, okay, look. People see what they want to see, so if it’s dark outside I can pretty much wear a hoodie and baggy pants and no one really even looks twice.

But yeah, daytime is less easy, and I do have a job. There are pretty simple spells that allow me to use illusion to mask myself. If I need something more physical, there are spells for that too. I may or may not have a bit of an alternate form, too… more you know, human. Some of us tiefs do, if our infernal side is particularly strong.

Q: You posted about doctors, surely they-

I’ll stop you right there. I also said they were stumped. Obviously I can’t tell them everything! It’s a pain in the ass.

Q: So tieflings can get COVID?

Fucking apparently. -_– Moving on…

Q: Okay okay so you’re a tiefling. What do you do for work?

Nothing exciting. I have some stuffs I am good at and I do it, sometimes they even make me tell other people what to do. I don’t mind that if I get to pick who works with me; I choose pretty well and I like to like… let people do what they do so I can like… do what I do.

Q: That’s pretty vague, Dio.

And that’s not a question. And that’s all you’re getting.

Q: Fine fine. Borderline SFW, but are you really always ‘spicy?’

Hn. Pfhahaha. I mean, that would be ridiculous, right? No one is spicy that much!

…..

Okay, fine, yeah. Pretty much, yeah. So I can turn it off, if I want… but I’m trying to be more true to myself and yeah, that’s true to me. As distracting as it can be at times.

Q: So, curiosity, sex, and rage?

Yes.

Curiosity because given the choice I’ll always like… err on the side of knowledge, even if it sucks. I read a lot, I know a lot of weird stuff, I learn just to learn!

Sex because I dunno my dude, go read Diotima After Dark. I think it speaks for itself.

Rage because there’s so much that makes me angry, I suppress a lot of things and I’m sincerely a hothead who has actually barely managed to keep it under control. Sometimes, I slip. Sometimes (okay often) I do reckless things.

Q: Tell us something about you that you want us to know?

This is the last question for this time. Laters!

#gettingtoknowme #extendedintroductions