Hurting each other
Why do people who love each other hurt each other?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that people who love each other always end up hurting each other… It’s not something bound to happen. However, it does happen, doesn’t it? Sometimes? It’s not something impossible, is it?
So…
Why?
Let’s take some step back.
As I once stated with my public persona, when you love someone you actually accept the possibility of being hurt by him/her. Loving means to be open, to lay down your defenses, to expose your intimate being. There’s no way you can enjoy love and not expose yourself to the chance of being hurt.
And, if you’re mature enough, you actually accept that you will eventually be hurt. What you accept, then, is that your friend or significant other might unwillingly hurt you.
That may happen… and usually does, one day or the other. Because nobody is perfect, and mistakes happen.
The point is, what do you do if it happens?
Normally, if the situation is not critical, the both of you work it out. Somehow. That’s what balanced people do. And when they do, their bond usually increases.
And it’s fantastic.
Sometimes, however, the situation is critical. It may be nobody’s fault, but it still is.
And that’s when the vicious loop starts.
And it doesn’t always ends well.
Sometimes, bad things are said and done. Leaving scars. Deepening the void between. Bittering the feelings.
It happens.
And there’s only one way out: owning your own part. You have to actually listen to the person who’s hurting you, and focus on how you’re hurting him/her.
Or, you can let the divide increase.
Your choice.