Stillness
Just before you commented on my previous text I had felt like the right moment had come to listen to the song that you shared with me more than a week ago.
There's a song I wanted to share with you, long time ago and yet
But please listen to it when you find a place of stillness and quiet, so you can feel it fully all the way through
It's funny to note that, probably due to my current conditioning, I reached this moment of stillness after eating three or four magic mushrooms (and you know that's not much), vaporizing a bit of cannabis and drinking a few sips of beer.
I hadn't consumed either of these substances in the last days and felt pretty good without them but still, to get into this deep relaxation, they all somehow help.
First of all I gotta say that the song is a real stunner. It's super calm but the bass hits somewhere deep.
Listening to it the first time made me cry for a few seconds and maybe for the first time in my life, I didn't interpret the feeling as either sadness or happiness.
I could have placed either in this physical phenomenon but I decided to leave it free of interpretation.
Maybe it was just a check to see if it still works.
Baby, don't you lose your grip
This line triggered two thoughts in my mind. First: How unstable do you think I am? Or how unstable am I, really? I may be slightly crazy but I don't think I'm
Second: Don't worry, every day when I'm driving I'm making sure that my mind and body are in a good condition – not tired but also not too excited, just calm and alert. I'm always aware of the cars around me and I listen to my own car and any signs of failure and before I get tired I stop.
I don't think that there were many periods in my life when it would have felt less appropriate to accidentally die. Sorry, but this thought makes me laugh xD
And I feel a bit crazy to laugh loud while I'm all alone but I know that it's nothing but healthy and good :)
And I just stepped out of the car for the first time since parking here (because the half of a beer wanted to get out) and realized how beautiful the clear night sky is. And the grass that got pushed over by my car and by the opening door is so long and dense that it forms a new ground above the ground that I can walk on with my bare feet. This is luxury.