i just want you to be happy.

you sit in your room at 5am in the morning, listening to the rain patter against your faded windows. the very first rays of dawn are peeping through the blinders. in your hands is your switch, joycons dirty from years of use. sweat stains and fingerprint smudges. matt plastic, black against your blue bedsheets. a square beacon of light. kk slider's trademark morning song murmurs a quiet tune through the shitty speakers. marshal is still up at this time, sitting on the bench, admiring the stars. you click A, and he comments on how surprised he is to find you still awake. he's worried for your health. he's worried you aren't getting enough sleep. he gives you a gift, a pair of sunglasses. you smile in spite of the cold. it isn't very cold anyways, you have a blanket and a hoodie on. but it is cold. you click R and select the happy reaction. marshal returns the favour. you're happy that at least someone cared. even if it was just a game. you're happy. you tell yourself that youre happy.

youre happy.

you lie back on your pillow, arms outstretched. after a while, you grab your eevee plushie and close your wet eyes.

how long more do you have to wait, you wonder. the rain gets steadily louder, as the morning stretches on languidly.

loneliness is killing you, but you don't know how to fix it.