March 2025 Update
“Let all crutch-comforts of the lesser loves
Consigned to blesséd oblivion be:
All praise demanded by the high aboves,
All pride-baiting conceit of luxury.
The soul, inverse of the mortal body,
Is starved by unlimited consumption.
Not that simple pleasures, abhorred should be;
Pleasure's golden rule is moderation.
Feeding instead on good boredom's silence,
The soul expands to fill the waiting void
Until it achieves a blesséd balance
Which can withstand all life-leaching tabloids.
But balance won must yet be won again,
It runs out each day like ink from a pen.”
— Hunter Dansin, Sonnet 2: Crutch Comforts
Well I have been writing sonnets, and my wife told me they are not half bad, so here's to being a poet. How easy it is to hold onto bitterness, and how tempting to heap scorn on perceived enemies and hopes disappointed. But the annihilater of reactionism is the truth that the only way forward is love. It is Martin Luther King Jr's “way of the strong man.” And how many that read this laugh bitterly and look at me like a doormat? Don't you think the man who most strongly feels indignation is the one most fervently acting in opposition to it? Those of us who strive to be kind, to love, to hope and live creatively are not blind. It is a fight. I am not quite sure who I am reacting to. Probably the news, this country's president, some circumstance in my own life. Well. It's not all bad. I've been writing. We are provided for. My family is beautiful.
Writing
I have been more or less steadily editing chapters of the last part of the book and it has been going about as well as I could hope. It is coming together I think, and I have been finding joy in it. I am bracing myself for the utter lack of structure towards the end though, and the work to flesh that together will probably be significant, but I will enjoy it more than querying, which (fingers crossed) I will begin doing for the first book this month. I just need to nail my comp titles down.
Audiobook
I think I am going to freeze work on it for the foreseeable future. Unfortunately it just takes too much time, and since I am seeking publication for the first novel it is probably a good idea to wait.
Music
But I do hope to produce some music. I still want to make a demo album for Lit Songs, and I made a small microphone upgrade which I am hoping will improve the vocals.
Reading
I almost accidentally titled this section “James Baldwin” while I was typing it, which would actually be a good summary of my February reading. I read two of his novels and a short story collection, and I loved it all. The usual tropes of ™Literature do not bother me with Baldwin, because he does not seem indulgent about it. He never loses his sense of purpose, and he has so much skill that no matter how ludicrous some of his character's behavior is it never feels unnatural. If you're curious about Baldwin but a little apprehensive, I would recommend the short story Sonny's Blues, and the novel Go Tell it on the Mountain.
And now I would like to ask, why do you read? I have been thinking about this question as I have been working my through The Voyage Out by Virginia Woolf. It is a slow burn novel, with next to no plot, and is a good representation of what many people bounce off of when they try to read some, ahem, ™Literature. Even I found myself asking, “why am I reading this?” “Is anything going to happen?” “Why should I care about these well to do british folks on holiday?” And then about 124 pages in I was utterly engrossed in Woolf's description of a young woman simply anguishing in the meaninglessness and terror and beauty of existence as she frolicked on a windy knoll. It was more immersive than any immersive video game I have ever played, more captivating than any thrilling scifi novel, more magical than any fantasy — because it was so real and because Virginia's description of her lived experience was so visceral. It reminded me of what grabbed me about her when I barreled into To the Lighthouse for the first time. I do not mean to look down on scifi or fantasy or pop romance or what have you — they have their place (and I myself am writing a fantasy novel...) — But if you haven't challenged yourself to read something difficult or a little more “Lit” then please please try. It will be hard, and depending on what you pick you might just hate it. But try again, because when you find a novel that encapsulates your lived experience, and not only encapsulates but expands and stretches it beyond what you imagined, it is unlike any other reading, and it might just feed your soul. Oh, and skip the foreword unless you care about that sort of thing, it will probably make you want to read the book less.
Listening
In the vein of sounding pretentious I have also been listening to Handel's Messiah. I picked up the CDs at a thrift store a few years ago and bounced off it pretty quick the first time, but this time I just left the disc in the van and have been giving it a shot. The musical skill is undeniable, but I think, unless you are sitting there live to appreciate the living breathing musicians it can feel a little showoffy. The theme does not help this feeling, but after leaving it on for awhile the music started to sink into me a little, and I was able to listen more attentively. Specifically on disc 2, there is a refrain sung by a truly gifted singer, that says “Behold, and see if there be any sorrow like unto his sorrow,” and the voice and the melody brought me to tears. In this age where it is almost impossible to tell if “authentic” singers have had digital help to correct their meaningless whispers, it is really refreshing to hear true singers, people who can stand in front of an orchestra without amplification or pitch correction and blast the Savior's sorrow from their belly. I had the great honor to take voice lessons from a true opera singer once, and while rock and roll singers have undeniable skill, the world that opened up when he opened his mouth was infinitely more vast and wide. It is a really impressive art, and I think it is a pity that opera seems to have become a joke to the mainstream. Anyway, here's a link to an excerpt that contains “Behold and See”. I'd recommend trying to listen meditatively with headphones so you can hear the true depth of the singer's voice.
Well that took a turn. See you next month.
Thank you for reading! I greatly regret that I will most likely never be able to meet you in person and shake your hand, but perhaps we can virtually shake hands via my newsletter, social media, or a cup of coffee sent over the wire. They are poor substitutes, but they can be a real grace in this intractable world.
Send me a kind word or a cup of coffee: