headchecks

back and forth back and forth—
riding the bathtub wall
riding the rocking chair
back and forth
a smile, a laugh, a flirt:
i'm falling down again
the way my heart goes—
back and forth back and forth.

i see only the scleras
all white and bloodshot
i can't bear to look at blue eyes anymore
they give me hypothermia, frostbite,
and back stabbing pains

back and forth back and forth
he comes to the table, offering nothing but himself
and his laugh
blue eyes,
white guys,
time flies