jonathan.beckett@gmail.com

2am

I’m sitting in a king size bed, looking out over Frankfurt from the enormous window of my 15th storey hotel room window. The clock is ticking towards 2am. After sitting in conference rooms all day, I worked all night again. I escaped the hotel room for an hour earlier to visit the local japanese restaurant again, and then to the supermarket, but other than that, it’s been another day and night hunched over the keyboard, stressing out.

I’m slowly getting to the point where I don’t care. I don’t want to get into why – that will get me into trouble. I’m just resigning myself to doing what I can do, and putting one foot in front of the other, regardless of the mayhem, and unrealistic expectations surrounding me.

I think the saddest part is that I was looking forward to visiting Germany this time, and I’ve ended up destroying my own trip in order to make unexpected amounts of progress against completely unrealistic expectations. All I have seen for the last 48 hours is conference rooms, a restaurant, a supermarket, and the hotel room. In another 36 hours I’ll be getting on a plane and returning home.

Maybe I’ll try and take tomorrow night off and head into central Frankfurt. Or maybe I’ll just sleep.

One more day to get through. One more day. I can do this.

It goes without saying that if anybody wants to light my phone up with emails, instant messages, comments, or whatever – it would be nice to wake up and be reminded that there is more to life than this bizarre bubble I find myself in at the moment.