Effort
I'm not sure I can really be bothered with trying too hard at this whole blogging escapade any more. Years ago I used to write long meandering posts about this, that and the other – things I felt strongly about – things I had been thinking about. Now all I ever seem to do is jot a few words down about the mundane day I have just survived.
Sometimes I read posts by others and see myself in years gone by – standing on a soapbox, extolling virtues to anybody that might chance upon them. Sometimes I read stories about life and adventure – stories filled with discovery and excitement – and remember that my life too was once new, brave, and full of hope too.
It's not that my life is devoid of any of these things of course – just that the ticking clock has now blessed me with a considerable amount of baggage to tow along my path. In time knowledge and experience seem to breed cynicism and apathy – you've seen situations unfold before – you know how things might go. You debate with yourself about volunteering your thoughts to the river of conversations flowing around you, knowing that it may be dismissed with an “OK Boomer” – so you volunteer nothing. You watch, content that you were right, and nobody knew.
The old quote “there is none so blind as those that refuse to see” has come to mind recently. I think perhaps there should be a corollary to it – “there are none so silent as those that refuse to contribute”.
This post isn't really going anywhere. It doesn't have a point. I suppose this is one of those “exhale” posts that people talk about. A mental health pill of sorts. Untangling that which shouldn't perhaps be untangled.