write.as/jonbeckett

The weekend I had been dreading is almost over. I'm writing from a hotel in Leeds, after leaving my family at Marylebone station, in Central London. As ever, there are stories to tell.

Yesterday was the annual town carnival – and in the usual way things happen in our house, our younger children were involved. One of them was walking in a procession with her Brownie pack, and the other had baked a cake for the cake baking competition.

Within moments of arriving in the corner of the cricket pitch, I was accosted by the local dance teacher to help keep an eye on the procession – to marshal the hundred or so children, and make sure the line didn't fall into complete chaos. I had been planning on taking photos, but she's kind of difficult to say no to (and it has nothing to do with her being very pretty, honest). As things panned out, I just wandered the line anyway (which had so many parents in it that it didn't need looking after), and took photos non-stop.

The snake of children eventually wound it's way into the centre of the carnival in the park, and then evolved into a dance-a-thon, lead by the girl that teaches our girls “Street Dance”. I'm not quite sure what power lycra clad young women with microphones wired to their head hold over people, but she had half the people in the park dancing for the next ten minutes.

Following that I disappeared – off to pack my bag for today. I wrote about this earlier in the week, but my only way of fitting everything in this weekend was to pack a backpack on Saturday afternoon with enough clothes to get me through the start of this week – and then take it with me to London (today) sightseeing. I couldn't do it in the evening because we were invited to a party.

We nearly didn't make it to the party. The same friends that have let us down several times before did so once again – with half an hour until we were supposed to leave. We called a taxi, and I ran to the local gas station to get cash. They were out. So I ran to the next gas station (in my immaculate shirt, which was turning into a bit of a mess in the process). In the end the taxi was half an hour late, but it didn't really matter – we were just “fashionably late”.

Oh my word... what can I write about the party ? It was a 40th birthday party for a good friend, and we knew a lot of the people there. From the moment we walked in we got sucked into conversations all over the room, and ended up apart for the greater part of the evening. A little while after arriving, a good friend that lives nearby accosted me, and whispered in my ear “Help me – I'm very, very drunk”. I looked sideways at her, and she grabbed my arm and giggled. It doesn't help that she is also very difficult to say no to, and is also very pretty (hmmm... there's a pattern here).

The party had a photobooth setup in the corner of the room that took instamatic photos of guests, who were invited to dress up in all manner of fancy dress costumes. I kept well away from it to begin with, but eventually got dragged in by the dance teacher, and my other half. I think the photo is already out on the interwebs. I had a huge orange wig, and looked like Peter Frampton on acid. My other half, and the dance teacher looked scarily like bond girls alongside me.

We eventually bowed out of the party in the early hours, after getting dragged onto the dance floor. I did a couple of the ridiculous numbers where instructions are shouted out, and then escaped just as the play-list took a turn for the worst.

We got home at about 1:30am, and crashed into bed immediately.

At 7am this morning – feeling ever so sightly the worse for wear – we scraped ourselves back out of bed, and set about getting the kids up and ready to travel to London. The day out was a part of our eldest daughter's birthday – she had asked for a family day, and to go on the “Eye”.

If you've never heard of it, the “Eye” is a huge wheel near Waterloo on the south bank of the Thames in London, with about 40 “pods” suspended from it. A revolution takes about half an hour, and eventually lifts you about 140 metres above the city. We were incredibly lucky – the sky was clear as crystal, and we could see out to the horizon in all directions. While waiting to board our pod, I took several photos of the wheel, and started to feel quite giddy – but once on-board was fine (thank god!). I noticed a few people sit down once we got high up.

After the eye we went straight to the London SeaLife Centre – a huge aquarium housed on several floors of a building alongside the Eye. We've been to a few aquariums now – I would say it was about as good as the National Aquarium down in Plymouth – although perhaps with more fish on display (there were many, many small tanks).

After leaving the aquarium, the day kind of fell apart. Miss 15 wanted to go in McDonalds. Bear in mind that she is ceoliac – meaning the only thing she can buy in McDonalds is a packet of fries. We both said no, and the rot set in immediately. She would no longer talk to us, or respond in any meaningful way. We got as far as walking to Trafalgar Square before completely losing it with her, and setting off home.

I waved my family goodbye at Marylebone mid-afternoon as they set off for home. Actually that's a lie – I gave them a hug, and then watched them walk off down the platform, hoping they would turn and wave. They never did.

Walking back down into the Underground to catch a train to Kings Cross felt unbelievably lonely.

After sitting in Kings Cross for half an hour, I boarded a train to Leeds, and tried to listen to podcasts to take my mind off things. Something else took my mind off things though (don't laugh). A girl sitting opposite me had a lycra top on, and quite obviously no bra. You know that thing where the more you try not to look, the more you end up looking? It was almost as if her nipples became the only thing on the entire train carriage. I told you not to laugh! I ended up alternately burying my head in the kindle, looking out of the window, or pretending to sleep for the next two hours. Oh. My. God was it a long two hours.

Anyway. I'm here now. Checked into the hotel. Ready to start the next few days on-site. I'm also dosed up on cold and flu tablets, and coughing like an idiot.