Thinking Too Much
I resurrected the Wordpress blog yesterday – the one connected to my real name. I had been “taking a break” from it for a few weeks – deciding if I really wanted to continue posting this forgettable rubbish out to the internet any more, or if I would slide under the radar and be slowly forgotten by the two or three people that bother reading it.
It occurred to me that I think about this stuff far too much. I’m sure I’ve read more succinct words somewhere about the importance of just writing, and figuring out why, or who it is for later. I used to try and convince myself that I was writing so future generations might know who I was at this time in my life – but I’m not so sure any more. Maybe it’s just for me – and maybe that’s fine too. A place to empty my head of the fairly banal thoughts that have been consuming it.
I often question the futility of the entire blogging escapade – and invariably remind myself that almost all the close friendships I have forged over the last decade have come via the words I have shared. Among the thousands of people also sharing their words – their hopes, dreams, ideas, thoughts, fear, and so on – communities sometimes coalesce. It’s the strangest thing, when it happens. You can be reading a Facebook post by somebody that used to write a blog years ago, and a comment will appear from somebody else that also used to write a blog – and you remember introducing them – you remember them becoming friends.
Most of us have never met, and will never meet, but a few of the friendships have endured for over a decade now. Perhaps when you get to know somebody’s thoughts before you know what they look like, how they laugh, or how they frown – perhaps the connection between you is stronger? I don’t know.
When I look back, I’m incredibly grateful for the friends I have made over the years. Yes – Carli, Andy, Ingvild, Amy, Lauren, Tiffany, Courtney, Tracey, Amanda, Michael… (this list could go on and on, so don’t get too annoyed if your name doesn’t appear) – I’m talking about you.
Getting back to the point of this post, maybe it’s time to stop thinking so much, and start emptying my head. Time to stop worrying about where, or how the words appear on the internet and just write the damn words.