write.as/jonbeckett

I wrote a few days that I had fallen off the internet bike this week – that life, the universe, and everything had conspired to drop me out of the whirling hurricane of tweets, instant messages, photos, blog posts, comments, likes, hearts, shares, re-blogs, and whatever else constitutes the “social internet”.

I've discovered something entirely unexpected. I'm not missing it.

I often spend the quieter moments of each day on the internet – as an escape from the mayhem that generally surrounds me. Late on an evening the internet has provided a reminder that there is a bigger world than the kids, the school, our house, and our jobs.

There is another world that I have been neglecting though – one filled with movies, TV shows, music, and perhaps most importantly books.

I can't remember the last time I sat down and read a book. It's almost impossible at home because there's always something going on – unless you count reading at bedtime. I tried to read in bed the night before last – my other half woke me as she turned in for the night – propped up, chin on my chest, book fallen to my side.

Apart from “Game of Thrones” and “Silicon Valley”, I haven't watched much television for years. I watched “Big Bang Theory” when it first appeared, and loved an Amazon pilot series called “Betas” (that they then cancelled). I downloaded and watched the first few seasons of “Comic Book Men” from the internet, and enjoyed it immensely – it has never been broadcast over here, so my only option is to Oatmeal it (if it ever does appear, I'll happily buy it).

So yeah... I've not missed the “social” side of the internet – maybe because it's not really social at all. I guess each major internet social platform is not social in it's own way. Tumblr is full of narcissists, Instagram is full of foodies, Facebook is a gigantic elitist pissing competition, and Twitter is filled with soap-box demonstrators – investing just enough effort to type 140 characters, but not willing to do any more towards the causes they broadcast.

I haven't had any of the Facebook apps on my phone for months now. Anybody that follows my Instagram feed probably wonders what the hell I'm playing at – posting photos of wine glasses, coffee cups, railway platforms, and such like. I guess in many ways it's a reaction against the narcissists.

I get it. I get why people post their face over and over again on Tumblr, Instagram, and Snapchat. It's validation. Validation that we're not that bad – that somebody out there likes us. I've always felt there's kind of a line in the sand though – and you slowly learn that some people are only out there to attract attention – not to forge a friendship. You essentially become statistics on a graph to them. Not everybody – just more than I would like to admit.

You might wonder why I bother with the social internet at all, if I'm so opposed to so many of the people that use it. Fox Mulder once said that all of the evidence to the contrary isn't entirely dissuasive. I think the same is true of people on the internet. If you can stand being in the middle of the mayhem for a while, you notice the quieter people on the periphery. The people that don't typically get their chance in the sun, because all the ass-hats stole the sun-loungers. Those quiet people are the only thing that has made the social internet persuasive for me for quite some time.

We share thoughts, hopes, and dreams with each other. We confide in each other. We will likely never meet each other. And yet we count each other as closer friends than those we know in the real world. We know each other's secrets and fears. We catch each other when down. We become a part of the reason to keep going each day – to keep getting up – to keep going to work – to keep on keeping on.

What am I saying here? Maybe that the social internet itself – the platform – is flawed in all sorts of ways. Not flawed by design – flawed by the way people misuse it – distort it. Conversely, people are also the chief reason to put up with the flaws – because amid the ass-hats, idiots, and morons, there are some truly wonderful people, who will become friends for the rest of your life.