it is fall now. another season over with out brent. the leaves are turning fast here and as the wind picks up they are blowing off the trees. the last few days have been very warm for this time of year. i got laundry out today in the sun. the sheets smell great! i remember how brent used to love the smell of sheet hung on the line. funny how he would always come upstairs after i was done changing said sheets.
i still miss him at night. i miss feeling him next to me, his snoring, his moving around , taking the blankets and pillows, and kissing me goodnight.
i got the iris planted this week. a friend mailed them to me. i cant wait to see if they will bloom next summer. i am really going to have to work on the gardens next summer. i let it go so bad this year. i really didnt want to be reminded of brent being out there all the time doing this and that. he was never happier than when he was working in the dirt.
i am making progress on the quilt. i have decided on a central block. it will be a house. i am ;not sure what else i will add to the block yet. the layout will come next summer when i can do it outside in the sun. this will help with colour and tone and placement. i should have enough made by then. i am up to 74 out of 256.
i have not felt up to writing. some days i come home and my emotional tank is empty and i cant feel anything. i use it all up at work trying to be normal. trying to make sure i remember what i have to do. my memory is not so good some days and i forget things. but i am older too so they understand.
i am still phoning my friend every night. we touch base and at least both of us have someone to talk to at the end of the day even if its only on the phone. we talk about our day and what happened or didnt.