monday of the long weekend. i have to finish what i started on thurs. moving my laptop to the other side of the dinning room table. brent will be working in the sunroom and going back and forth behind my chair so i guess it just makes sense that i move it.

i am feeling alot better than i did yesterday. so far so good, but day is not over yet and i am not sure what is for dinner. will have to check the freezer. me i would like soup and tea. just something simple on my tummy.

i am going to try and start transplanting today. the sunroom should be warm enough now and not go down to freezing over night so it should be ok.

well dough is on for panzarotti and birds are put away...the excape when i can the cage. started dishes and so far no plants done but cleaned more grout...how exciting is that.

i am still finding life at home hard sometimes. the dizziness and fear of falling gets to me sometimes. i am not very co ordinated sometimes depending on pain levels. i do what i can now and when i cant i ask for help. i hate asking. its not something i am used to doing. being a former military wife there was never anyone around to help me so i had to do for myself. you just got on with it . you made choices decided on things when he was not home. and if he didnt like it well too bad, he was not here to help me. alot of times he didnt like it. but its not like we had the internet and a laptop to talk to one another all the time. i waited weeks for letters and phone calls that may or may not happen. i felt i was forced to stay inside in fear of missing his call and then get accused of being with someone.

in this time of enforced solitude many years ago i fell back on what i knew best , my ability to make things. so i started to knit and crochet. and made blankets and sweaters and eventually baby things. i love to knit and still do . i guess if i knew then what i know now i would not have gotten married. it was a very lonely life and i dont make friends easy. most postings i didnt have any friends at all. all i wanted was to move home to be near my family such as it was. the only thing i made my ex promise was that we would move home when he was done the military. he broke that promise. and then i thought all bets are off and you dont give a crap about me or my kids.