well that was fun...not. i am from a time when things where not so complicated. i am still learning my way around this blog site. i find it hard to remember things as well..one of the fibro signs. there are over 200 signs of fibro. will have to count how many i have someday. but that might be too depressing...so maybe not.
i used to see a client with fibro and found that very depressing. thinking this is what my life might be like. i dont have control on how my fibro will progress or what it will do in my body. all i can do is keep going every day. and i am sure no one with an auto immune disease says yeh i really want this. fibro is hard on the body....but harder on the mind. with things that change from day to day..you never know what the next day will bring. i could have a good day where i can concentrate or a day where i am dizzy all day and i am afraid to stand up. i am alone most of the day. ok not really alone as i have 3 cats. but they are not going to be much help if i fall down. but they are good company. but they will be the last cats i will ever have. so once they are gone thats it. i will miss them for sure, but someday i will not be able to take care of them. and i dont expect others to care for my pets.
today it is snowing and cloudy and its may. guess its another stay inside and knit kinda day. once i use up all my sock yarn that will be it for socks. i want to work on my quilt and maybe finish the top at least and send it out to be quilted. its time to finish things left too long on the back burner. i have made 2 very large crochet blankets and working on a 3rd, all for the grandkids. will have to put name tags on them so they go to the right child .
i know i talk about the end a lot but with the amount of pain i have it sure feels that way. and yes i have pain meds. its just enough to dull it so i can at least do things during the day like get dressed and shower etc. i dont eat a lot as i always feel sick, another fibro sign. only good thing about that is i have lost some weight.
todays project will be to try and finish a sock and to make some fruit cake...i love it. and at this point i dont care if its only for xmas. will make things when i can for what ever reason. because i still can. have to feed the birds and sweep the steps still. will have to get brent to bring full laundry basket up when he comes home from work. yes my partner is out working. and if he brings home covid 19 to infect me then what? i could die...a possibility yes. my immune system is not the best as it stands now. so yes i could catch this very easily.
so break time. waiting for glue to dry on my art piece. time for tea and to check on the dried fruit for the fruit cake. will bake it up later on.
some say you develop fibro from abuse or an assault on the mind or body. some ladies i have talked to in the online facebook groups have been very helpful. no one knows why this happens. this could have started in grade school when i was being bullied,or when i got married at 21 and my ex drank and verbally abused me. i dont know. all i know is we have today only and we must live each day as full as we can....