Journaling about life and mental health for whoever wants to relate or talk

Why are you mad if I care?

I am the kind of friend that will come to you and ask you if you are okay when I see a shift in your behaviour, I won't ask for an explanation on why or what is going on if you don't want to talk about it, but I will ask you to tell me how you feel. I think that if you are friends with someone you should care enough to ask when you see that something is not normal. Moreover since I tend to be very empathic, so I will be able to tell if something is off and by saying you are okay, you won't be able to fool me. So why do some people get mad, if you find the time to go towards them and just wonder if something is not okay and if they need help. I get it I tend to lie a lot about being okay, but with my friends I will most likely tell them the truth, not always explaining it, but just sometimes saying I am not okay, but I don't want to talk about it. It doesn't take much effort, and even if I choose to still lie, because I don't feel confident saying that, I would never get mad at someone for asking me how I feel. I would never be mad at someone because they cared, and I would not behave cold and poorly for a day or two until I feel like behaving normally again, and act as if nothing ever happened. It is not okay to be like that, it is not okay to make someone feel like they did something wrong for caring, and it is not okay to behave poorly and then act like nothing happened. That is just a way to loose people, because no one wants to walk on eggshells with their friends and feel like they can't care, at some point they will just stop to. I don't know how long I can handle this behaviour from others, I just feel so done with everything. I just can't handle people having a 180° shift in their behaviour and act as if it is normal. You want to be mad at me, be mad, don't be passive aggressive, I overstepped a boundary, say so, don't shut me off, communicate, that is how things are solved, not by anger, miscommunication and faking everything is okay. Stop making a fool of me, all of you, I am done being in a real life soap opera! I don't want to be the kind of person that doesn't care, and I am fighting with all of myself not to be, but I feel like I am loosing my will to care day by day, and I am scared of loosing it completely.

Truth is that love and caring spreads, so keep caring for the people that surround you, you are wonderful souls, that have the power to change the vibes around you, so use it to inspire someone to care, instead of discourage them to.

Lots of love,

Maybe I don't have a soul