Separation in the time of coronavirus

And here's the existing list. Yes — many are petty. But they were things I accepted, even if they drove me mad. Until the latest lie. But this is a tool for me to vent. And I'm going to use it.

• “I just did 3 days of dishes” – to a coworker. But sent the day after I'd put away dishes and then refilled the dishwasher and ran it, cleared up the redemption bottles, and ran the dishwasher – all so I could start a meal the next morning (for dinner). He washed a few things after that dinner, but certainly not 3 days worth. Everything is an exaggeration.
• Playing the depressed, lonely victim, but already actively dating (and on Tinder) at most 6 weeks after being told by his wife of 16+ years that she needs to end it due to his lies and having no trust in him. Poor baby.
• Complaining about the basement and that he can't do it much longer, as though he's the victim. Despite still having meals cooked for him and helping him out with other things.
• Lies/gaslighting
• Constant sighing, in disappointment, like life didn't turn out as expected. Join the club.
• Often not fully resetting covers on pots/pans to keep food warm
• Talking over and through movies or anything that's on TV
• Everything is yes/no, black/white, 0/1 – except dishes. Somehow they can still have food on them, but be “clean” and put away.
• Leaves lights on
• effectively condoned cheating to kid — by setting up auto-click hack for his games.
• “offers” to “help” with dinner prep rarely, and usually at 4 pm. 99% of the time it's a worthless gesture as I've bought food and planned it out well before the last hour before leaving work.
• rarely puts things back where they were originally — so we can all have the joy of hunting for something he put back, but can't remember where
• can't handle simple tasks or acts like they're huge deals
  
  • getting car almost shipped to west coast — we were moving to the east coast
  • didn't find our townhouse rental — I did, from 2300 miles away, while working full-time and fixing and selling existing house and watching our kid who was no longer in school
  • will add water to soak the cat food bowl — but doesn't wash it or make sure that at least the hard food is topped off (improved a bit post exit announcement)
  • somehow can't manage to enter my discount ID at grocery stores or gas stations. places where I've had 100% success. literally — it's never failed for me, but somehow he claims almost 100% failure rate.
  • signing the old house closing paperwork in a timely manner. I had to pester him to do it while I was driving across the country.
  • changing his tax withholding.
  • emptying recycling and NOT putting the bag we use to transport it to the all-in-one dumpster into the container (they don't recycle plastic bags — you're supposed to empty the contents into the bin and he routinely has some issue and will tell me he just “had” to put everything in while still in the bag)
• Can't handle bigger tasks — like helping with the move
  
  • didn't even offer to drive cross-country after everything else was done (even though both my mother and sister repeatedly offered)
• regularly exaggerates to everyone
  
  • “furnace is dead/no heat except from pellet stove.” Furnace wasn't dead — just smelled like fuel when it first came on. We had plenty of heat (from furnace, pellet stove and supplemental space heaters). And fumes. But we weren't even remotely cold, never mind freezing, and no carbon monoxide.
• argues or gets upset when someone points out the facts or that there's info that's incorrect
• insists certain (often minor) things are true that are not
  
  • the gas can pops right back out when you fill it up
  • I didn't see the dirt on the dish/cup/plate, and I looked
• inability to keep track of any details
• immediately jumps to worst-case scenario (and dismisses all other possibilities)
  
  • snowblower – “I think it's stripped gears” (but was just shear pins)
  • generator – bad gas and just needed liquid treatment, but was already planning to take it somewhere
  • generator – no power to house — must need new $240 cable instead of doing testing first (cleaning contacts and reconnecting and testing when not in the middle of a storm solved the problem)
  • email from boss at work — “it's part of my permanent record”
• doing things half-assed just to get them done (while bemoaning how long it takes me to start and then finish because I refuse to rush/half-ass everything)
  
  • bedroom closet organizer
  • stuffing clothing in the furnace vent
  • painting spots on the ceiling beige (instead of buying the correct ceiling paint)
  • lean-to that is rickety
  • lawnmower that was damaged with overfilling of oil
• being pissed I don't 100% support what he says to kid — as though I owe some sort of fealty to him and his words (and that he can't be wrong and I can't disagree)
• asking kid to do things in a way that opens the door for his refusal —– setting up the inevitable showdown
• whining. regularly. And then whining about kid whining.
• acting like whatever work he's just done was so valuable (and as though I should thank him for his contributions — like snow blowing or mowing or cleaning the pellet stove) — all while not remotely acknowledging the food planning, shopping and prep I do, all the bills I juggle, kid’s schedule, any other things that crop up, the laundry for kid, etc. things that are done every week of the year to keep things running. Note that I do usually get thanked for dinner — just not all that leads to that happening.
• putting dishes away in the wrong location — even after mentioning it repeatedly — so then I have to search for them
• manspreading and junk and clothes dumped through the house — sofa, breakfast bar, chairs, bedroom, basement, shed — takes up way more than 33% of any space
• asking me questions like I'm weather.com, alexa or google
  
  • then giving me crap about “incorrect” answers/opinions
  • and then giving me crap when I say look it up or I don't know (even if I have a clue)
• constant throat clearing