Only as old as you feel
Let me ask you an – as I assume – silly sounding question.
How old is your self-talk?
If you were to draw a face to the voice, imagine it speaking, how old would that face look? And do the advice you get fit that age?
I lately enjoyed a night out in town with friends, a “let's go out like in the past” “we haven't done such a thing in quite a while” night.
And it was fun. Most of the time. When George was quiet. For George, all the other people around us were the perfect age. This was mostly the case for people younger than me, which was never truly phrased that way of course. You are older than them! Yes, George, I noticed.
Surprisingly, even older party folks were the “righter” (?) age than me. Because they don't try to be young. They have a certain dignity you don't have.
George, I was simply ordering a drink and enjoying my time, having a conversation while enjoying the music!
Music you know so well since it was written decades ago!
...
Eventually, I ignored George. The inner conversation got stuck in a loop without any progress. And at the same time: There was a nice time to enjoy! I focussed on being myself (what then maybe translates to “my own age”). So, the story was over? Not quite...
...when spending a night out in town, you can feel as young and old as you want. But this degree of freedom collapses in on it itself when you wake up in the morning. (Feel free to imagine the emoticon of your choice here. Sad, angry, HaHa, ... your choice is yours to make.)
Did George then win this one in the end? I would argue a “Yes, but...” kind of point:
- Yes, I was older than other people gathered there.
- Yes, “let's go out like in the past” set me up for it.
- The bargaining is “Get a night, pay a day”
But...
- I had fun. As a person my age. Full stop.
- It's not like there is a time machine and I refuse to use it.
- And if there were: Would I want to?
Again an – as I assume – silly sounding question! But consider instead of rejuvenation more of a time-reversal, a trade. You become younger, but your entire life becomes the life of a younger person!
Have you ever been eavesdropping on conversations by kids, teens, young adults? They face problems we outgrew! Problems that might sound petty now but they weren't! And in case of time-reversal, they won't! (Please overlook the temporal dynamics of my grammar.)
How old are we? How old do we feel? And how old do we want to be?
It is the consequence of our finite life that the older we get, the more we seem to want the reversal button. Or do we simply want more time? Time to enjoy the moment we have now?
Next post: “Trying to outrun a team”
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