But we were never close. I felt missing out sometimes when I saw kids facetime calling to their grandparents all happy, then their grand told them they would make good food for them when they got home. But even if I had caring relatives, I don't know if I would want that. Or would it only make it harder for me to be myself? Like how we all studied the same history lessons, other kids learned to be proud of our bravery, accomplishment and a sense of duty, all I learned was how to run away from danger.