My best friend
There was this huge kid at school that I never talked to and didn't care for. One day I found out she was into stars. It just so happened I was into black holes. Before we knew it, we promised we would go explore the world together. It was fun to be 16 and have a best friend.
We all want to see ourselves as 3-dimensional characters. But judging others using shortcuts is way more effective. From there, we select very few people we like to get to know them better. Then we realize, they are not just a goth, or a punk. But what happens if the person is radically different, almost like false advertising?
It's clear to me that to have any chance of being understood at all, one needs to make effort to know others.
I spent no time thinking about genders until my first job at 23. All my childhood I was surrounded by people who also didn't care for gender norms. During school ceremonies, Eta and I hid behind the bushes for we didn't want to wear proper dresses. Some kids made fun of my appearance or behaviour but who cared? I expected they would get over it as adults. But most only move from one stereotype to another, with some flavor of progressive. And to be honest I don't see it getting any better. If using shortcuts is still working for someone, why change? After all, I too, use shortcuts for most people I encounter every day. And only leave curiosity for people that I know to be outliers.