It was quite disappointing in my early 20s that I looked for answers on how to deal with social interactions and met with moralizers. Because I had trouble regulating emotions, and I didn't feel my reactions aligned at all with the culture.
“Good friends mean you have to be happy for your friends' success.”
“You shouldn't feel annoyed, he didn't mean any harm.”
Until you spend more time with these people, and realize, they don't practice what they say.
When you think moralizing as a defense against uncomfortable feelings, you will understand why. For it's not about how you actually feel, to recognize it, and to make sense of it and move forward. But to prevent the feelings themselves from happening at all. It's probably why the majority of atheists are insufferable. It's not just what they believe in. It's a defense against grief, that results in controlling behavior from them onto others, and narcissistic need to force people to think and feel like them.