Why Am I Mourning the State of Film?
Have you ever put your heart into something for so long, only to be met with disappointment and nothing in return? How would you feel? Your first reaction might be to think that something is wrong with you, that you must be doing something wrong. Maybe you are writing a bad story, or creating a mediocre film or making crappy art. But wait, maybe you're not doing anything wrong. Maybe you're living in a place where authenticity becomes a sin, and the truth is shameful.
It's as if what you need to create is something that feels like it requires a political agenda, a cultural agenda, or a world agenda. You think there are so many reasons for making art than satisfying the status quo or satisfying the gatekeepers of the powerful festivals or channels of distribution. As a creator, you have to fight back and push the boundaries beyond what is possible. If those gatekeepers are only there because they've built a brand for themselves, or because they've been around for a long time, then you are here now and you have a lot of work to do. There are a lot of people who want to see new things: create it, and they will come. You cannot lower the lens and obscure the vision of a lot of people, maybe the majority of people, because you believe their stories don't matter. Who said that a film must be violent or controversial or provocative and that this is really what people want to see? Making films is not about preaching or virtue-spreading. It is entertainment with a purpose. Creating art is a form of self-reflection.
You're not saying that films should not entertain, but they should be a reflection of reality, at least some reality you are living. Or if they were not a reflection of reality, they should do something different, like an off-version of reality. You can do both, but you're doing none: you're only doing them to provoke.
Reality is not sublime. The purpose of art is to make it sublime through your visual or emotional lenses. You make it less sublime by obscuring it through the lenses of the gatekeepers. You truly understand that if a project or work of art is weird, it gets more attention, but why does this rule have to be the only rule? Why can't weird and non-weird go hand-in-hand?
It seems that 99% of people are trying to play a game of pleasing everyone else. In my opinion, this road is a slippery slope and a dangerous one. Creating art is a responsibility, but how can you serve when you've become irresponsible and shameless? As an artist, you need to return, again and again, to what is worthy. How easily are you dazzled and deceived by job titles, expensive clothing, and accolades?
You make the mistake of assuming that celebrities and public figures are, by default, happy. To believe so will make you doubt yourself even more than you already are doubting. The road to acquiring anything material is never satisfactory and will never be.
You seek what others are seeking. You compare yourself to others and wish for what others have. You are infatuated with the image portrayed in the media, and you think that's the only way. You doubt the quality and purpose of your work if it doesn't satisfy the gatekeepers and if it doesn't inflate you with the image you project of yourself. As a result, your art starts to suffer, your work starts to suffer, and your internal happiness suffers. Internal happiness is separate from external conditions. It can only be found within. You can only go so far in trying to impress the world. As long as it impresses you back, you'll be happy with that. But if it doesn't, you suffer and become depressed, and maybe you even contemplate suicide because you think life is not worth it and your purpose is not worth it.
By mourning films and art as a form of self-expression, you commit more to the creative flow because you're not only looking for short-term gains and short-term goals: you are looking for permanent hope: Resilience is the antidote. Confidence is necessary. Composure is essential. To wake up to a world that you have designed for yourself is the answer. To design the life that you wish for is the answer you are seeking.
Progress, progress, progress. Internal happiness feeds on progress. It's about living in both worlds, living a life where you give a lot to art, and at the same time, you don't compromise your hopes and dreams. You don't sacrifice who you really are.
Only you can understand your goals and desires. Only you can understand who you are and the path you are going to take to live a life of art. There may be a million solutions, but the real solution is simple: the real solution starts with you.
You need to revisit the core values of what makes you real and truly who you are. That's the only way to shatter the goals of the gatekeepers who keep scoring at the cost of your internal joy and eternal happiness. The problem starts with you. You let them win because they believe that the majority of people will be pleased or rewarded by external things – who cares about internal rewards?
Those of you who seek internal gains may be mocked and ridiculed for being old-fashioned or outdated. In a world of glamour, constant buzzing, and distraction, it may seem foolish to disregard all of that. You may be considered naive for missing the train of fame, attention, or even degraded moral values. Of course, you will face ridicule because you may be fighting against the stream. Real values like family connections, genuine education, reading, writing, and communication are often neglected. If you want to stand out and make art, you need to return to the core of these values: switch off notifications, communicate more, read more, write more, draw more, paint more. In other words, become more authentic.
What you genuinely feel in your gut and heart is real. Don't deflect your true emotions because your rational mind is telling you otherwise. You will discover that you were wrong by intellectualizing everything because you want to look smart in front of others or yourself. Stick to your true feelings, even if you are ridiculed by others. Those who mock you will come to appreciate you and your work later.
This is not a call to become more traditional. I believe in progress and that the world is always moving forward. Technology is evolving, science is improving, and humanity must move forward to survive. However, we need more space for genuine art and real artists. This is a call to revisit authenticity and creativity. Perhaps, with more “real creators” out there, we can shatter the walls of all the gatekeepers, build their experiences, and create something of true value and power – the power to change and make a real difference and regenerate hope by connecting with others.