First Light, Holy Light
You can never put down that which moves your soul.
Before dawn’s whisper,
I rise—
the sky not yet blue,
my body still heavy
with sleep
and something else.
The road hums beneath me,
empty but for headlights
and thoughts
I hadn’t said aloud
in a long time.
Each mile
was a prayer.
Each turn
a little more light.
I smile—because I know
what waits.
A day of light,
of truth,
of brothers and sisters
gathered in joy.
And then—
the faces,
the warmth of welcome.
The sense that I belonged
without question,
without condition.
But somewhere
between the parking lot
and the first song,
my heart trembles.
Because she’s not here.
And oh, how I wish
she could be.
The program begins—
scripture, song,
faces turned upward,
tears in my eyes
for more than one reason.
I feeling the presence of God—
yes—
but I also—the absence
of the strength of her embrace,
her voice nearby me,
Melodically singing.
Still, I sit with the ache.
Let it come.
Let it be part
of this worship too.
Because love like that
doesn’t disappear.
It folds itself
into moments like these—
a memory in harmony,
a heartbeat
in the silence
between words.
And as the light pours in
through picture windows,
I whisper a thanks.
For truth.
For hope.
For the day to come—
and for the one
my heart still carries
into every sacred place.
#reflection #essay #memoir #journal #osxs #100daystooffset #writing
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Thank you for coming here and walking through the garden of my mind. No day is as brilliant in its moment as it is gilded in memory. Embrace your experience and relish gorgeous recollection.
Into every life a little light will shine. Thank you for being my luminance in whatever capacity you may. Shine on, you brilliant souls!
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