Chronicling the collapse of the United States

Your application for Continued Survival has been denied

Dear Human,

Thank you for your application for the post of [The Ability to Continue to Survive as a Human Being and to not be Killed]. From an initial shortlisting process to match applications to this position, we regret to inform you that we will not be able to proceed further with your application for this particular [Pathway to Survival].

Kind regards,

Your Executioner

 

Hi Human,

We greatly appreciate your interest in [Continued Survival] and the time you have invested in your application for [The Ability to Continue to Survive as a Human Being and to not be Killed].

After careful consideration and reviewing of all applications, we have decided to continue the process with other candidates whose skills and experience more closely match our current needs of [Alive Human].

We wish you all the best in your future endeavors and hope you will check our career site for additional opportunities as we continue to grow at a quicker pace.

Sincerely,

Your Executioner

 

Dear Human,

We appreciate your interest in [Continued Survival] and your time in applying for the [The Ability to Continue to Survive as a Human Being and to not be Killed] position. Unfortunately, after careful consideration, we've decided to move forward with other candidates who more closely match our requirements for [Continued Survival].

Please note that the volume of applications we receive can be very high, and we often have to make difficult decisions with several amazing candidates. Sometimes, it can be small details that make the difference. Unfortunately, we cannot provide more detailed feedback at this time [On Why You Shouldn’t be Allowed to Continue to Survive].

As a growing company, new positions will continue to open, and we hope you will keep an eye out for other opportunities on our career site.

We wish you all the best in your job search and professional endeavors.

Best regards,

Your Executioner

 

Dear Human,

Thank you for taking the time to apply for the position of [The Ability to Continue to Survive as a Human Being and to not be Killed] with [Society].

Your application has been processed and assessed in line with the specific requirements for this role, after careful consideration we regret to inform you that you have been unsuccessful on this occasion.

We would like to retain your details on file and may be in contact with you if an appropriate opportunity to join our team becomes available.

Thank you for considering [Society] as a prospective [Provider of Life], we wish you every success in your [Continued Survival].

Kind Regards,

Your Executioner

 

Dear Human,

Thank you for considering [Society] as a potential [Provider of Continued Survival]. We appreciate your time and effort in applying for a position with us.

Although your achievements are impressive, we regret to inform you that we have chosen to move forward with another candidate for [The Ability to Continue to Survive as a Human Being and to not be Killed].

We understand that receiving a rejection can be disappointing, regardless of your progress in the application process. However, we encourage you not to be discouraged by this outcome. Your relationship with [Society] does not end here, and there are steps you can take to open yourself up to future possibilities.

We are constantly growing and may have suitable opportunities for you in the future. You can stay updated on all our open roles by visiting our [Survival] page.

Please stay connected with us on [Personal Data Extraction Site] to gain insights into [Society] and explore our vibrant work culture.

Once again, we sincerely appreciate your interest in [Continued Survival within Society] and your efforts throughout the application process. We genuinely wish you success in your endeavors and hope our paths cross again.

Kind Regards,

Your Executioner