A pretty weird thing
I recently realized a weird category of memories I found myself holding on to tightly.
One day I went out with a friend to go shopping at Trader Joe's. She fully was in a committed relationship, and we are platonic friends – but she mentioned that to others it must seem like we are a couple. I've had several moments like this, and I find myself looking very fondly at them.
I've felt guilt at this, as it feels like I'm disrespecting the platonic relationships I have with these friends – but I realized I don't necessarily see myself thinking of them when I feel fondly. For me, it feels like that's a casual way of them saying “hey, you look like someone loveable – I could believe you to be in a regular relationship”.
I've found with the handful of times I've experienced this, I've started to believe more that people could see me in a romantic context – not the platonic friends persay but that there's a potential in me. These memories have honestly helped me a lot to unlearn some of the crueler stuff I've heard as a child, so I sincerely thank those friends.❤️