Adding in the second exercise
In the current version of Recovery from Parkinson’s Janice Walton-Hadlock (JWH) describes the “new exercises.“ (Search for that phrase in the book to find the relevant section.) These are the core of the protocol for anyone on self-induced pause. So for now these are my focus on this blog. But so far I have talked only about the first exercise, the dialogue. For this post, I want to shift to the second exercise, the requests for the felt presence of the “other.“
In Recovery from Parkinson’s JWH says, “The second exercise could begin when, in response to the first exercise, the constant communicant began to seem real and trustworthy enough. This sense of a real relationship took some people years to attain.”
While that might suggest giving a good deal of time to the basic conversation with the “other“ before adding in the second exercise, it’s clear it depends on what constitutes “real and trustworthy enough.” My experience was that at a fairly early point in the process, perhaps no more than a month into it, my communications with the “other” did feel somewhat real, at least slightly real to me. I took that as an indication that it might be worth giving the second exercise a try. Even if I was starting too early in the process, I saw no reason to believe it should cause any real problem. Of course you, the reader, will have to make your own decision. But now, months later, I am not aware of any problem caused by my selection of that early point for beginning the second exercise.
I don’t recall whether I felt anything in particular the first few times I made the request, “Let me feel your presence.” But before long it was leading sometimes to mild tingles in my arms. Fast forward a month or so and the tingles had shifted to my face. Soon these took the form of a fairly well defined band of slight tingles around my eyes. Before long I found I was expecting precisely those tingles, and wondered if that expectation might be limiting other feelings the request could bring. After discussing it with a friend well versed in practices such as meditation and finding what seemed to be some relevant online discussion, I decided to try not to expect anything in particular. The result was that the tingles now came not just to my face but also to my arms and legs.
In any event, while I tend to feel tingles, JWH makes clear in Stuck on Pause that a given individual may feel any of many possible sensations: “The feeling might be an expansion of your heart, or it might be an electrical tingling that makes every hair on your body stand on end. Or something else entirely.”
These days I use those tingles as an indicator that I have clicked into the right mental state, that is that I have connected with the “other.“ I repeatedly make the request, “Let me feel your presence” as well as related requests (see Recovery from Parkinson’s) at various points during my dedicated sessions and here and there throughout the day.
A couple of months or so after beginning the second exercise I was delighted one day to notice the tingles coming unbidden. Perhaps not coincidentally I had, just a day or so prior, asked the “other“ to help me stick better to the dialogue, to be less distracted. Make of it what you will, but it seemed almost as though these unbidden tingles were the “other” saying, “Hello, I’m here... please stop being distracted and connect with me.” And I’m pleased to report the tingles continue to come unbidden from time to time. :)
How do you feel the presence of the “other”? Let me know!