PD Revelation

This page will serve as a condensed timeline of my progress so far, touching on highlights, the evolution of my routine, etc. I will add to it as warranted by new developments. (If you're unfamiliar with the basics of the JWH protocol see this introductory post.)

August, 2019
I began implementing the JWH protocol. My efforts with it, at this time, were quite limited. Very gradually, I invested more time in the process. Struggling to stay engaged with exercise #1 throughout the day, I focused much of my practice around dedicated sessions.

January, 2020
I began this blog.

Spring, 2020
I began noticing symptomatic benefits that seemed to result from the protocol. The first and most dramatic of these was a very significant reduction in fatigue. Up to that point, fatigue had been by far my most debilitating PD symptom. Within the dialogue central to the protocol, I began to learn the fatigue was driven by anxiety. Addressing the anxiety through a simple, self-administered CBT, again within the dialogue, I experienced an immediate, very substantial reduction in fatigue. (Find an updated list of symptomatic benefits here.)

I began to identify a variety of techniques I could use to improve my adherence to the protocol.

Summer, 2020
By now I was well involved in exploring how I might deepen the process. This has included developing a better understanding of such ideas as emotional surrender.

A friend and I began a monthly Zoom support group for those pursuing or interested in the protocol. This has provided a wonderful, international network of friends for information sharing and mutual support.

I began to have some success in exploring and experiencing sensations of heart expansion.

Fall, 2020
I continued to explore ways of deepening the process, often tinkering with the nuts and bolts of what I was actually doing/saying in the protocol.

I intensified my involvement in the process, adding in more sessions and finding ways to engage with the two exercises more frequently and more consistently throughout the day.

I had the breakthrough experience of turning off pause, the neurological mode that drives Parkinson's! Though I slipped back into pause mode, the experience of turning off pause was completely transformative and removed for me any possible doubt about the validity of what I was doing. (In fact, I don't believe anyone who has worked toward, then been successful with pause turning off could possibly retain any doubt about the cause of idiopathic Parkinson's or the validity of the JH protocol. My first such occasions were the most amazing mind-body experiences of my life.) I consider turning off pause to be one of the two holy grails of the JWH protocol, the other arriving once pause stays off and recovery symptoms arrive, followed by complete recovery.

Winter, 2021
Eager to get back off pause, I was frustrated to come down with a cough lasting some three months. It seemed to disrupt my progress, and I lost touch, to some degree, with the proper focus.

Spring, 2021
The end of the cough and some good advice got me back on track.

In April I entered a new phase, one of turning off pause repeatedly. This signals that I may be starting to get a little more control over pause. In time it will stay turned off and I can expect to begin experiencing recovery symptoms.

Summer, 2021
The same phase continued, but with pause turning off less frequently than at the peak in the spring. This told me I had more work to do to solidify feelings of safety.

In July a brief medical issue impacted my sense of safety, creating a detour in my progress. On the plus side, it acted as another reminder that I needed to better cement feelings of safety.

October, 2021
Upon comparing relevant passages in RFP I came to the conclusion that my recovery process is not unusual, that I actually fit within the majority of those who recover, doing so gradually, turning off pause intermittently until it eventually stays off in a lasting way. This realization was a bit of a relief!

Late Winter/Spring, 2022
This was a time of consolidation, frequent occasions of turning off pause replaced, for an indeterminate time, by a renewed emphasis on strengthening feelings of safety and nurturing my connection with my Friend. This shift was likely related, in part, to my reaction to the above-mentioned medical issue. Possibly as important were less readily identifiable psychological factors. These things presented an opportunity to add to and strengthen the foundation on which my recovery will rest.

Summer/Fall, 2022
A continuation of the same period of consolidation, dragged down a bit by a bout of covid in July. (This raised the question of virus-caused channel blockages possibly interfering with my ability to turn off pause.) A lingering cough beginning to clear in late August as well as my commencing visualizations to clear channels fueled my optimism going into the fall. :–) Incremental improvement in the quality and quantity of my time in the protocol. May have neglected, to some degree, the important task of working to identify what issue had arisen to prevent me from getting back off pause.

Winter/Spring, 2023
Increased efforts to identify what has lately been keeping me on pause. No definitive answers, but steady optimism and perseverance and, increasingly, a sense that I am in fact moving closer to again turning off pause. In this process I have had to relearn some key lessons.

Summer/Fall, 2023
More of the same, but beginning to identify causal connections between my thoughts and feelings such that I believe I am inching toward more control over pause turning off than I had before.

Will update again when I have something more dramatic to report...