The Blowjob.
The elicit blowjob i gave my 9th grade love,
A one sided love,
He was in-love with my best friend whom shared the same name as me,
I tell this story to the man i love now,
Who doesn’t love me back,
All true apart from the blowjob,
Ive made this up just to impress him,
It never happened and never would have,
He tells me availability isn’t attractive,
He tells me this is why my 9th grade love never loved me,
Why he only loved my best friend,
I didn’t understand that back
then,
I had only ever made myself available,
But now i do,
If you want a man to want you, You must make him crave you,
Your attention,
Your validation,
You’re image
You’re energy that he can’t access,
But craves,
Like he craves it from the mother,
Who coddles him quietly,
Like the father,
Who ignores him loudly,
Once you have him,
You bend your self,
To keep him entertained
To keep him away from the endless parade of,
Better,
Younger,
Hotter,
Less modern,
Models on display,
Yes, that’s it,
Even in true love,
Love that feel so bold,
Your ribs feel crack when you breath next to him,
Attention needs to be kept,
And entertainment needs to be set.
~Jess Elyssa Rose